Wedding Month

This is my view today as it has been for the past few days. What started as wanting to update 1 bathroom before the wedding has turned into painting almost all of the downstairs, refinishing cabinets, replacing light fixtures and appliances and a few other things. Our living spaces are a huge mess but our contractor assures me it will all be done in just a few more days. (He's fabulous, btw, in case you are looking)

Let me back up. I know the last time I was on here that this place I'm living in was labeled the "transition house" but it has become our permanent home. (I now have a beautiful 2.8 acres for sale in Burleson.) God's provision for this house was unexpected and totally not what I had planned. We're here now and we're settling in and want to make it our own.

It's wedding month, though. I don't know what I'm wearing to the wedding. I'm having a rehearsal dinner at this house. I'm having out-of-town folks coming in. Jessica will leave and fly to Birmingham to start her summer job and then fly back again for 3 short days for the wedding. Jacob will leave DBU and move back home for the summer before changing colleges in the Fall. Josh will move out and to his new address with Christy. At this particular moment I'm a tiny bit overwhelmed.

But, it's wedding month. On the last day of this month Josh and Christy will be wed. They'll stand before family and friends and, more importantly, God and join their lives together. I could not love Christy more. She is such a precious gift to Josh and to our whole family really. On May 31st, Josh will have a wife, Jessica will finally have a sister, and Johnny and I will become in-laws. Everything will change.

This morning I was reading in chapter 1 of Colossians. Check out verse 17:

And He is before all things, and in Him all things hold together. 

I just like the assurance of that - that He is immovable, unchangeable, eternal, holding everything together.

I know I wrote that this house is my permanent home but I know my real permanent home is in heaven. My citizenship is in heaven and I eagerly await the day I'll see Jesus face-to-face. But, in the meantime, I'm gonna make this earthly home a reflection of us and a place where we can share life with family and friends.

Our family is growing, btw!

Serving the King,

Jeanette

Moved

Those that know me know it doesn't take much to move me. In fact, I am moved to tears fairly easily. The fact that we have moved - physically, from our house of 9 years - has caused some emotion to rise up in me. It was the home of my kids' adolescence. It was where we shared life and so many important markers. It's the place where we gathered with extended family and many friends. All 3 of my offspring left from that place to go to college. In some ways, their leaving marked the time Johnny and I decided to move.

We just closed on that house today but we were supposed to 2 1/2 weeks ago. It's a long story and beside the point but we moved all our earthly possessions out on a Monday and Tuesday in anticipation of closing on Thursday of that week. Once everything was out, I spent the following day, Wednesday, cleaning and making sure we didn't miss anything. I started upstairs, in the kids' rooms. As I went from each of their rooms, I thought about so many memories, conversations, milestones. I prayed for each of my kids and so many of the friends that passed through those rooms. Such happy days, happy memories and even some difficult ones. You know for sure that I was bawling. In the first room I fell to my knees out of pure gratitude for every single day, every single moment of life and every person that passed through those thresholds.

Nine years is the longest Johnny and I have lived in one place together.

We are moved into what Johnny affectionately calls our "transition house." It's a house that belongs to a friend where we will live these next months while we build what we hope is our "forever house" in the country. Not everything is unpacked (nor will it be) but we're settled and grateful for a place to call home during this time of transition.

And, yet, I'm reminded that this "transition house" or even the planned "forever house" is not really my permanent home.

For we know that if the earthly tent which is our house is torn down, we have a building from God, a house not made with hands, eternal in the heavens. For indeed in this house we groan, longing to be clothed with our dwelling from heaven. 2 Corinthians 5:1-2

For our citizenship is in heaven, from which also we eagerly wait for a Savior, the Lord Jesus Christ.
Philippians 3:20

Walking out of the door of our home for 9 years brought emotion but, I admit, the thought of my eternal home rushes over me and fills me with an emotion that I cannot explain or fully comprehend. A place of no separation, a place of no tears, a place where lightbulbs won't need to be replaced because the glory of God will be the Light. A place that is in the very presence of Him, the Holy One. His home. His dwelling place where those that belong to Him will be with Him forever.

Yeah, that moves me.

Johnny and I waited in the lobby today for our turn to sign the papers that mark the end of our ownership and the beginning of another's. The family actually goes to our church and they passed us as they were on their way out and we were on our way in. We remarked about what a great place that house was to raise teens, to have lots of folks over, to live. We hope they have the same experience.

God gives us places to dwell, people to share our lives with. For that, and so much more, I am so grateful.

Serving the King,

Jeanette

Road Trip Weekend Wrap-Up

The title for this post could also be "My Synopsis of Passion 2014." I'll admit it, sometimes I am discouraged by culture and things happening in the world. Then I sit in an arena full of thousands and thousands of college-age students worshiping Jesus and I'm blown away - again - by the power of the Almighty.

Here's another admission - I was not all that excited about going to Houston and, more importantly, not excited about having to drive in that awful traffic. But my son, Josh, is now our College Pastor (I feel emotional that I just typed those words - that child I gave birth to is now a College Pastor. I'm overcome with thankfulness.) so I felt compelled to go. I'm so glad I did, it was so worth it.

Friday night started with worship and Louie Giglio preached from Isaiah 6. One of my favorites, by the way. He talked about how Isaiah was undone when he experienced the breath-taking mercy of God. He said, "God is breathtakingly beautiful in His mercy." I love the thought of that.

Friday night ended with a Hillsong United concert which started past my bedtime but, then again, we were at an conference for college students.  Again, I'm so glad I was there. They sang some of my favorites but, maybe, my favorite moment was during an instrumental part of Oceans and it seemed as though the crowd spontaneously started singing the chorus over and over again. It's how I imagine heaven - voices filling the space singing with hearts joined in praise. They ended with The Stand and With Everything. It was incredible.

Saturday morning could not have started any better for this big fan of David Crowder and, perhaps my all-time favorite song, O Praise Him. Following Crowder was Francis Chan. He used chicken bones to illustrate Ezekiel 36. Yeah, real chicken bones. Here's a really great question he posed in reference to 2 Peter 1:5 -- when people say to him they aren't really feeling God's presence he responds, "Are you making every effort?" (Check out verses 6-7 to see the list of things we ought to be making every effort toward.)

Beth Moore taught the next session. My daughter (who didn't go with our group & wasn't sitting near us) sent me this 2 word text following Beth Moore, "KILLED IT." Oh yes, Beth Moore totally did. She said these simple but profound statements, "We were born with a fight in us. There's an ugly fight and a beautiful fight. We can't fight the good fight and the ugly fight at the same time. We are either going to fight for people or with them." She ended her time with statements of confession. Oh, to hear thousands and thousands of college students standing and shouting "I agree" to the great statements of our faith. So powerful.

The next session was about the Bible. The cause that Passion was raising money for at this conference was to buy Bibles for people in Iran. The curator from the American Bible Society was there and her testimony and journey were so interesting. Even more interesting was the story about the 1st Bible printed in America. It wasn't printed in English because that was already being done in Britain. A man named John Eliot wanted to tell the native Massachusetts Indians about Jesus so, first, he had to learn their language. But, it was only an oral language so he had to figure out how to write it then he had to translate the Bible into that language. After a 15 year journey, the first Bible in the American colonies was printed in that language. I can't get over the 1st Bible printed in America was for missions. It's our legacy! The Bible was printed in 1663 and some copies were sent to England along with fundraising letters so that more copies could be printed for the native Americans. Also present was someone representing UVersion, the Bible app. The app has 750 versions of the Bible in 450 languages. Eight-eight people/second open that app. Ah-mazing!

Judah Smith was next. When we talked about Mr. Smith later my son said I was so white, Protestant, old-school. Which, frankly, I am though I like to think I'm fairly well versed in what's current in culture. Once he got through an introductory story that I thought went on just a bit too long (hence, my son's declaration on who I am) what Judah Smith said was so powerful. He said, "God doesn't do renovation. He makes brand new." He went on to say, "Where I stand determines how I walk but how I walk never determines where I stand." He had 2 spots on the platform that he walked back & forth between making his points and made this point, "The great struggle of the Christian life is lived in me instead of in Christ." (2 Corinthians 5:16-21 was his text)

The final session, as is the Passion custom, was taught by Louie Giglio. He was again in Isaiah 6 and said in order to shift from consumerism (in the church) to costly following of God, you must be stunned (verse 5), seared (verse 7), and sent (verse 8). The real encounter with Jesus sends us out. He continued by saying, "The gospel never stops with me."

There are not enough words, or the right words, or I don't have the ability to craft the right words, to express how it impacts me to hear so many college students, young adults, and their leaders packed into a sports arena for the common purpose of making much of Jesus. There are some college students & young adults out there - some that I have the privilege of knowing & traveling with this weekend - that are living it out. Their passion for Jesus is so evident - not just in an arena - but in who they are. I can't wait to see what God continues to do through them.

Serving the King,

Jeanette

What's My Good?

I so like to think no one is watching me in my front row spot on Sunday mornings. Honestly, I don't think about it which was apparent this last Sunday (if not all Sundays really). Let me write this disclaimer first - I really like all the songs we sang last Sunday. And, I'm a pretty big fan of the groups who recorded the 1st 2 songs we sang - I purchase & download their music, I listen to them on Spotify. Are there times, though, when you're singing a song - and you may be like me and really like the song - but there's just a line or two and you just have this thought: is that really correct? Is it true theologically?

I had that thought last Sunday. (here's where my thought about no one watching me comes in) I had a chance to ask Johnny about a particular line in a song during the welcome time. Just briefly. We agreed that maybe it wasn't completely correct and talked about it later that afternoon. Then, we got to another song and I had the same thought and just looked over at Johnny and laughed a little. He knew what I was thinking. Y'all, after 25 years of marriage sometimes I believe we read each other's thoughts. I kinda love that.

This blog post is really about 1 line in a song: "You make all things work together for my good." It's likely a reference to Romans 8:28, "And we know that God causes all things to work together for good to those who love God, to those who are called according to His purposes." The message of the song is good. It's just that I think that verse is plucked out and misused - not in relation to that song but in general. How often do you hear someone say just that one little part, "God works everything for good..."?

I don't mean to be particular but I guess I'm spoiled because I've listened to such good, exegetical biblical teaching over the last 25 years.  I so much prefer hearing a message preached or taught from a passage of Scripture where context and truth is considered as opposed to someone making an outline of general truths and plucking verses out to make his or her point. Really, it's just a personal preference. The truth of the Bible is finite and verses really need to be considered in context. But I'm getting off topic because I really am stuck on the whole of Romans 8:28 and what it means.

First of all, God works all things for good of those who love God and are called according to His purpose. John Gill wrote it like this, "those who work in concert with the will of God." I'm sorry, but a general thought of God working all things for good for all people is just not truth. We can't be out in the world doing whatever we want and expect God to work it for good.

Sometimes God's good may not look like what we expect good to look like. God can use trials and suffering for our good. Certainly when we are suffering or are in trials we don't think that's good. Romans 8:31 reminds us that God is for us! Sometimes what's good for us doesn't feel like good. Good has to be in line with God's purposes. The note in my Ryrie Study Bible notes that good is "conformity to Christ." When we get to the end of chapter 8 of Romans we find that nothing, absolutely nothing - death, life, angels, principalities, things present, things to come, powers, height, depth, any created thing - nothing will be able to separate us from the love of God.

What if our good is just that and only that - we can never be separated from the love of God? Not the good we desire or expect but that God is for us and nothing can separate us from His love. That in the process of making all things work together for good we are made into imitators of Christ.

What's good has eternal significance. God's love never changes and we can't escape it. That's good. God is working out things in my life so I become more like Christ and that's for my good.

Now if I can just get the part right where I'm always working in the concert with His will that would be really good.

Serving the King,

Jeanette

A New Posture for Prayer

Happy New Year! A new year is a great time for new things. My man and I are not big on New Years' resolutions. Apparently, we're not the only ones since no one in our Life Group yesterday admitted to making one. I guess after years of making them & not keeping them we've just decided it's better not to make a big declaration of change that we are pretty sure won't stick. Johnny and I did make one though - we resolve to build a house on our property in the country in 2014. I am really, really counting on that one.

For the beginning of the new year, I'm reading the book of Ezekiel. Today was chapter 2 - all of it since it's only 10 verses. Here's the 1st verse in the NASB, "Then He said to me, 'Son of man, stand on your feet that I may speak with you!'"

After that one verse I felt compelled to stand and pray. At first I stood there thinking about all sorts of things - reading the rest of the chapter, re-filling my coffee cup, what work I need to accomplish today so I need to sit down and get to it. So, to combat that, I started reciting characteristics, attributes, (as Ryrie calls them) perfections of God. It turned out to be kind of a holy moment. Or moments, I guess. There I stood, hands lifted, praying for my family and friends, myself and my church.

I don't anticipate that I'll be standing to pray everyday from now on. Maybe I will, I don't know. But, I'll be honest, sometimes I don't pray like I should. I can be so distracted in my prayer time, in my usual prayer place. There are times when my feet need to be moving to pray. There are times when I need to be flat on my face because of the weight of my prayers. There are times when friends or family email me, call me, Facebook message me & ask for prayer and I whisper them up at a moment's notice.

Maybe a new prayer posture is just the start I need for a new year of praying. I'm not making it a resolution but I guarantee I'm looking for more holy moments like the one today in 2014.

Serving the King,

Jeanette

Why I Went to Church Today (hashtag Icepocalypse2013)

First of all, let me state from the outset, this blog is about me. It's not about you. I know in me writing that you're going to think that it really is about you but, I promise, it's not.

Second of all, you should know I'm a homebody and the most chicken person you'll ever meet. I'm afraid of everything. Johnny and I went to some friends' house Friday night and my blood pressure was certainly up by the time we arrived. Icepocalypse has me wanting to stay put, that's for sure. My man, on the other hand, is not afraid of anything and driving on ice is no problem for him.

My reason for going to church today has nothing to do with being married to the pastor but it has everything to do with loving the church. I've mostly always loved church. Of course, there were some times when I was younger when my parents forced me to go when I didn't want to. I also stopped going to church by my own choice for a while when I was in college. I'm not sure about the exact moment but, after a time away, I started going back. Then I went as a leader with my home church to Centrifuge after I graduated from college. God got a hold of me there and, since that time, there's been no turning back.

I know the church is the body of Christ and is made up of people and not buildings. I also know that we can meet with God anywhere but there's something sacred and holy about a weekly gathering in the building we call church. I had such a sense of expectation today. I was there to meet with God and I was not disappointed.

My reason for going to church today had to do with a book I just finished reading for the second time. It has affected me so much I literally can't stop thinking about it. The book is The Insanity of God by Nik Ripken. Part of the book is about Mr. Ripken's journey to areas where the church of Jesus is persecuted and his conversations with those folks. In one European country, a believer who had been imprisoned said the Ripken, "Don't ever give up in freedom what we would never have given up in persecution! That is our witness to the power of the resurrection of Jesus Christ."

Don't ever give up in freedom what we would never have given up in persecution.

I know sometimes I take for granted how easy it is to decide to go or not to go to church. I forget how much some people around the world are willing to risk to gather to worship, to own a Bible, to share the name of Jesus with someone else.

One of the songs we sang this morning at church was "How Great is Our God." Every time, every single time we sing that song I think about my first trip to the East Asian continent. I think it was 2007. Those folks know about persecution. They live it. On that trip one of our stops was at a women's center. I was traveling with a group of American women and we had an opportunity to share briefly with the women at the center. The center was for teaching trades, the Bible, and also teaching English. As we concluded our time there, we wrote the words to the chorus of that song on the board. It's not too many words and they are fairly simple. Every time, every single time I hear or sing that song, I see those precious women's faces at the women's center singing that song.  Definitely one of those times of worship that time or distance cannot erase.

Mostly, I went to church today because I love God. Really, I'm not insinuating that if you didn't go that you don't. In fact, those guys who were up there before church started to shovel off the parking lot so we'd be safe probably love God more than I do. I'm just in a place right now where I'm desperate to hear from Him. Did you ever have a time when you were going through a valley and God was so evident that you didn't have to wonder what He was up to? Even in a hard circumstance you felt His presence so personally and vividly? Today Johnny preached about Immanuel, God with us. One of his points was "God with us does not always change the circumstance but it always impacts the results." I'm not in a valley but I so want to hear from God like I did when I was in one a few years ago. Unlike Ahaz in the Scripture text today, I did ask for signs and God used some and it blew me away. Right now, I want the voice without the valley. Part of that is me knowing that I need to slow down and focus on Him. Not on doing things but just Him - worshipping Him, adoring Him, learning more about Him to know Him more. So, going to church today was to do just that.

Finally, I'm really glad I went to church today because McKenzie sang "O Holy Night." That was heavenly!

Be safe out there, people! Us Texans just don't do ice!

Serving the King,

Jeanette

The Struggle Between What I Want and What I Want

I'm selfish and I know it. Isn't that the fallen nature of mankind - to be selfish and self-centered and to always want what we want? My problem is my struggle between what I want in the flesh and what I want as a follower of Jesus. And, truly, I want to be a follower of Jesus and I want that to be the thing I want most. But it's not near enough of the time.

The thing that's most pronounced in my life right now is this house I'm dreaming of in the country. I'm all about Pinterest and pinning my hopes and dream rooms all on my board I've titled "For Our House in the Country." My spare moments are spent looking at floor plans and the website my sister-in-law, Ginger,  turned me onto, houzz.com.

But I want to be thinking about Jesus and how to live like Him. I want to be thinking about how to advance His Kingdom, build His Kingdom not about building a house in the country.

I want a big house with wood trim around every door and window and plenty of room for my future grandchildren to come and play. I want marble countertops, wood floors, and every new gadget that lets you lock your doors & adjust your thermostats from your iPad.

But I really want to feed hungry people, to have more money to give so that someone will hear the gospel message and be saved. I want to have room in my budget so I can go on mission and share Life and Light with others. I want to support my relatives and friends who are living on the mission field and have given so much more than I have.

I want life to be easy and comfortable and on my timetable. I want my current house to sell for my asking price. I want my kids and my husband to be healthy and happy and healing for that thing that I've asked about so many times.

But I want to know what it's like to live dependent on the one who holds time in His hands and, really, to whom time doesn't matter. I want to know what's like to rejoice and be thankful in everything. I want to know with every fiber of my being that whatever I'm going through now is being worked for good. That not one struggle or moment is ever wasted. I want to live with eternity in mind and not just the things that are going on around me right now.

I really want to live like I believe heaven is real and it's the dessert, the icing on the cake. I want that thought to be the first when I wake up and when I lay my head down at night. I want to remember that people are suffering and are being persecuted for the things I take for granted. And, as a result of remembering, live to make a difference. Not focusing so much on my current abode and that future place in the country but that future place where I'll live forever.

This struggle, this desire to have what I want and what I want is daily. Really, I want it all. I want both. I want to have what I want and I want to have what God wants for me. So, I'll keep praying about that until what I want becomes what He wants, until my heartbeat is for His. Until the things that I want in the flesh don't matter near as much as the things that matter to Him. Until easy and comfortable doesn't matter near as much as obedience. Until bringing God glory is the thing I want most of all.

Serving the King,

Jeanette